Writing through Adversities…

Is it possible to write when your emotions are in a whirlwind? To write when you cannot concentrate? Can writing through turbulent emotional upheavals be a balm to your frayed nerves?

For some of you, the answer to these questions is a resounding YES! For others, when the pain is new and still raw…the absolute last thing on your mind is sorting through the maze enough to talk in intelligent sentences much less write anything intelligible.

I seem to be in the second of the two options. Even now, over a month after my dad’s massive stroke, I find it difficult to gather my thoughts. I most probably would not be writing this particular entry, but for a friend asking if I’d posted anything on my blog lately.

At times like these, I feel most like a fraud. A very sad fraud. I feel like a painting of a once beautiful meadow filled with the excitement of rampant color; vivid yellows, blues, and greens blended from a perfect palate until they seem to pop off the canvas. Then… before the blending of hues can be fully appreciated, the meadow in a blink of an eye, becomes completely devoid of color. I look inward and see nothing but shades of grey. I see a heavy heart that beats under protest, emotions worn to nothing just as the artist’s charcoal wears under the constant friction of creating art. I am tired, lost and I don’t quite know how to let go…

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